Got a shocking message today that pushed me to blog. Find it here http://www.eziaha.com.
Got a shocking message today that pushed me to blog. Find it here http://www.eziaha.com.
‘…Can we learn, can we glean, can we STAY IN THEIR SLIPSTREAM…?’
Bianca Juarez Olthoff. Propel Conversation series.
Happy new week guys. I am bursting with sunshine this week.
My online coaching classes are LIVE again and I realized just how much I had missed it.
And all the fun and gists it brings
Ok before we get carried away, let’s blog about the slipstream
S L I P S T R E A M!!!
Ever since I discovered this term, I have been throwing it into LITERALLY EVERY conversation I have. You see, I am super huge on mentoring and in my 10000 Teachers post, I mentioned how we have Teachers and Mentors who we don’t even have a personal relationship with but we lean into their lives from the materials they continue to resource us with – books, messages, seminars, social media accounts, etc. I called it stalking there, and if I had heard Bianca say this before I did that post, I would have said we should stalk them by staying in their slipstream
Slipstream: An area of low air pressure that is immediately behind a vehicle that is moving very fast and that other vehicles can ride in to go faster with less effort… Merriam Webster Learner’s Dictionary
Oh sweet Lord Baby Jesus!!!
I have literally LIVED in the slipstream of my Teachers all these years, and especially this year. You see, Bianca said this in the PROPEL EFFECTIVE DECISION MAKING video as she explained how that she makes decisions by consulting her mentors (wise counselors), and that we all should have both close mentors and distant mentors.
Per the distant mentors, she said we need not even be about trying to build a personal relationship with them or harass them to respond to our every tweet or comment (or ask for a FOLLOW BACK which frankly is the most stupid thing I see on SM). Most wise counselors and Mentors leave enough information in their slipstream and if we stay close to them, we will most likely find the answers that help us make better and wiser decisions as we navigate this life and its obstacles.
Lemme proceed on this by looking at this in two ways. First as the person staying in someone’s slipstream and then as the person who is leaving a rich slipstream behind for others to glean from…
I woke up last Friday morning to a question from my Sister on whether it was true that Gmama Joyce had gone to be with the Lord.
At first, my heart broke, and then even before I confirmed or not, I realized that the simple Truth is that Joyce, if Jesus tarries and other things stay equal, is going to die a LONG time before me. But that woman has one of the richest slipstreams ever in the history of any Bible Teacher or Preacher I know, so I quickly posed myself the question ‘Have I been maximizing this rich slipstream she leaves in her wake?’ because Joyce Meyer has definitely done her best to be a distant mentor to millions of women around the world, including me. Joyce is lavish in sharing information about her life, her ministry, her mistakes, her struggles, her relationships, etc.
Just see all the information and wisdom she dropped with us at Code Orange revival
I don’t know who it is that inspires you, but girl forget about whether they respond to your email or mention, just stay in their slipstream and soak in anything they are generous enough to share. And be very sensitive in your spirit too, so that you can connect the dots when they share. I also pray too that God uses my Teachers to answer specific questions in my life as they arise. This happens a lot with Christine Caine for me. If there is something I need clarity on, as I pray about it, a lot of times, I find my answer on Chris’s IG page.
It is crazy I tell ya.
Ditto Heather Lindsey. They have such rich slipstreams that sometimes I am like
‘You guys please stop tweeting or preaching let me finish grasping the ones you already have na’
Maybe you are in the banking sector, or anywhere in the career world, and you have a Mentor there. Maybe one of those Superstars with whom booking an audience is literally impossible.
Stop stressing yourself. GET ON Google, Buy their materials. Watch their videos on YouTube. Attend their seminars. etc. Don’t be there writing long letters and emails and waiting for them to invite you over for lunch. Probably won’t happen, but they have resourced you through their slipstream.
It just annoys me when a Mentor tells someone ‘Oh I have preached or written about it here. Please go and find it’ and then the person says ‘…ehn please but I still want to talk to you…’
Trust me, most times, most of the questions we wanna ask them, they have already dealt with in one of their resources. One-to-One mentoring is almost impossible these days. How many people will someone like Leke Alder, for instance see if he keeps doing one-on-one? But that dude pours out his knowledge on Social media literally daily, and has seminars and workshops but someone will still be foolishly asking him ‘Eh Sir please can I still get your number to call…’
Really, this generation we need to stop this nonsense. It is too annoying. Looking for special attention despite the rich slipstream a person has left for us.
We are too lazy to do the work the slipstream requires. We use our internet data to follow people’s lives on Snapchat and watch reality TV and movies. God forbid we google keywords and names and put 2 and 4 together to find wisdom for our current situation.
And that is part of what I will be sharing with the ladies who come on board my P413 intimate session which i hinted in this Post. How to effectively navigate slipstreams of our teachers. Hopefully my flyer will be out next week, but you really wanna book a space now.
Ok so the second part of this slipstream business is now turning the spotlight on us. The truth is, there are some people who are in your slipstream because you have wisdom about a situation they can learn from.
SHARE YOUR STORY!!!
STOP MINIMIZING YOURSELF!!!
Share your victories, failures, challenges, mistakes, etc. We have a funny culture in Africa where we ONLY share (or people just see even without us sharing) the good and the end product, and leave off the ‘HOW’ of our journey. Sometimes we don’t share because we want to appear perfect, we think we have NOTHING of worth to share that anyone can learn from, or we want a bigger platform. Some other times we don’t share because we don’t want to be seen as show-offs, or we just can’t be bothered to share. We don’t write biographies, blog, or put in our Memoirs.
I see someone I like and admire, I get online and there is almost NOTHING in the person’s slipstream. But in the Western world (and this also happens with Africans who grew up or were exposed to such environments), they are quick to tell their story, write a book, open a blog, etc. You know, a friend was gisting me of her friend who went through a bad patch in her new marriage and ended up divorcing, dealing with severe depression and then getting help and healing. Then she writes a book. That friend gisting me was saying it in a ‘Na wa ooo. What does she know that she is writing a book about?’ manner and me I was just laughing at her (my friend that is). You think someone needs to go to school for 6 years to write a book?
No, Sir. When you have a Story, you find a medium to share that story, whether via a book, a blog or your social media handles. That is the kind of permission that Social media and the internet generally has afforded us. You don’t need a BIG TIME Publisher. Just open a Facebook account and get the story out. Trust me, there are people who will one day stumble on your slipstream and you will be an answer to his/her prayers. Forget about how many people like it or comment. DO IT FOR THE ONE if you have to.
Now can I address Millennials (those of us born between 1982 and 2002) like most of my blog readers, who have active Social media handles and all? I know that in the past, we hid every single spiritual activity we did so it doesn’t look like we are being over spiritual or showing off. But honey, we need to take our light and shine BRIGHT in the SM world.
It is absolutely OK to come and tell me you got together with a group of friends and prayed for 5 hours straight. Oh my Darling, BRAG about your Christian friendships and relationships and stuff that sustain it. Brag that you are abstaining from pre-marital sex. That you used to be a Lesbian/Homosexual but not anymore. You do X Y and Z for Jesus. Brag to the heavens about your Church and how your Choir unit is da baddest!!! And how your Bible costs you so much.
And what percentage of your income goes to books, tapes and CDs. Trust me, it is OK to tell me that you went to an Orphanage and you make a habit of giving a percentage of your income to the poor. Talk about how you run your Company like a Christian Organization.
IT IS OK!!!
And before you go all Matthew 6 on me, let me beat you to it…
What Jesus was really about in those verses is YOUR MOTIVES!!! Why are you sharing? So that people will hail you? So that you can be approved, cheered and endorsed by men? So you appear important, spiritual, or rich? WHY ARE YOU SHARING?
That is the koko of that Scripture. If your motives are wrong, just SHUT UP. But if your motives are to inspire more people into the Jesus Culture, by all means share, with wisdom. And when the praise and glory want to be wrongly ascribed to you, RE-DIRECT THEM TO JESUS!!!
YOU DO NOT BRAG FOR ATTENTION. Like Paul said in I Cor 1:31, IF YOU ARE GOING TO BLOW A TRUMPET, BLOW A TRUMPET FOR JESUS!!!
You know, Joyce did this crazy good message on MOTIVES (sorry, I can’t recall the Title, I just journalled as I listened) and it set me free. I have a naturally showy personality but Joyce taught me to always check myself and filter the motives behind my actions through the Word.
The Christian world is lacking in examples ooo, all because we don’t want to appear ‘too Christian/holy’. They are shouting us out and down, and sadly, a lot of us are cowering.
Reducing and then ultimately losing our voices, finding them only when it is time to talk football or movies.
The world is Ok with telling you their sexcapades very proudly, and how much their vanities cost them but we Christians just wanna sha be ‘silent Christians’. WHAT AN OXYMORON!!!
Oh, how the world needs BOLDER CHRISTIANS. Bold, Deep, Mature and Joyful Christians. Christians who wear the tag so super proudly and BRAG DIFFERENT!!! There is someone in your slipstream who needs that info to take a step for Jesus. I know how hearing about someone’s giving just stirs my faith to give too.
Don’t worry if anybody yabs you or calls you out, like they attack every time a Christian is just being a Christian. If your motives are right, it should not even bother you. You should be too busy doing what God has called you to do, stopping long enough to pray for them out of LOVE and not to argue with them.
This is really not about cheers and jeers or applause and condemnation, it is about Christ, His Message and Culture, AND your SLIPSTREAM both for now and the future.
Oh how grateful I am for Christians like Wale Jana who I featured here. He brags wella about his faith (@walejana on SM Sites) and I am not saying you should be like him, I am saying be proud of your gospel and wear it well. Don’t let the fear of men and their rejection stop you. How thankful I am for Heather Lindsey who shares a lot about her life and whose slipstream is so rich.
She gets attacked a lot, but it doesn’t stop her. The people in her slipstream are thankful and the many more who will find it someday will be too. I sure am!!!
I am also thankful for myself and the slipstream my blog and life offer. I get all those emails that wanna advise me or shut me down but frankly, I don’t even look at them twice, or respond. No emotional energy to waste explaining myself to anyone. I just know I didn’t do it for you, JUST YET, (because chances are high that one day you will come back to resource and equip yourself from my blog). I just carry on with my assignment and do my MOTIVE-CHECK all the time with my Jesus. You can be sure that if He tells me Eziaha do this or that, IT IS AS GOOD AS DONE!!! I don’t have time for the world, Which is why we should not live for worldly approval. If we do it for the world, then their disapproval will get to you.
DO IT FOR JESUS, He is enough!!!
And then do it for the people in your slipstream.
The slipstream is real guys. Let us get to living our lives fully for JESUS and as we are led, we share in our slipstreams so that we keep the FAITH GOING IN VERY PRACTICAL WAYS.
That definition of slipstream above ministers to me because of a couple of words within
Slipstream: An area of low air pressure that is immediately behind a vehicle that is moving very fast and that other vehicles can ride in to go faster with less effort… Merriam Webster Learner’s Dictionary
As we learn from people (and vice-versa), we learn the lessons without all the pressure and mistakes they made, and we can go further, and faster more efficiently and with less effort (not ‘NO effort’ ooo because we must pay our own price) to get even better results.
I mean how amazing is that?
So even when I share my stories, there are many people who avoid stepping on some of the landmines that almost destroyed me. And then there are many more that are clueless on how to navigate a certain situation and wham!!! They are flooded with light when they read something some bold FIERCE CHRISTIAN CHICK has written or spoken about. And they too can take that to their own slipstream.
But remember, WE BRAG DIFFERENT… The GOAL is JESUS , NEVER us!!!
If you are going to blow a horn, blow a Trumpet for God… 1 Cor 1:31b MSG
Yup I know I talked about TFS Academy, my online mentoring Academy when I blogged DO IT AFRAID and said you could send your mails. It will be up next week. Wanted to sort out my October weight loss class first and be sure it is smooth running. Now that’s done so I can re-open TFS. I think you can still mail me. I am yet to confirm how many I have, but if you don’t get in this time, you can be on the waiting list hun, so apply and get in my slipstream. Details are in this Post linked above and this, and please be sure to read both first.
Whoop, if you missed Squad 1, I will be starting another CHRISTMAS-IN-OCTOBER promo from Friday October 21 to Saturday November 19. Still 6k in Naira for the 4weeks.
And then my next Class after that will be in December!!! Guess what I Christened it? (Yup christened haha)
DISCIPLINED IN DECEMBER!!!
Because the yuletide is not a reason to throw restraint and discipline out the window. It is Jesus’s birthday not ours and we all know Bros J got discipline on loc’down!!! So that will be for those who want to stay accountable at Christmas, and then they also get my CHRISTMAS GIFT which is a workout tee branded with workout related Scriptures… Whoop!!! Christmas is looking LIT already!!!
If you are not on CoachE’ mailing list, you may wanna get on board. I send weekly emails on super fun and super educative Food and Fitness matters, especially for women. Today I talked about why some women snap back easily post-baby and some don’t. In the past I have discussed CS and Vaginal delivery, The Good&Naughty Carbs, etc. It is like a private blog post, so drop your email or mail email@example.com to request to get on it. We really need to pay more and better attention to our health especially as women. If you think the info won’t help you now, it will in the future ooo.
Plus connect with me too on Social media
IG @eziaha @coachesquad and Twitter: @eziahaA @coachesquad
And CoachE Facebook page here. I share so much information there and that is a good way to stay in my healthy slipstream. And generally be in my life because I share a lot on both platforms.
Abuja is almost here and sometime this week, i will do a Post with more details on this and info on how to be one of the two Chicks I wanna sponsor for this. Please tell all your Abuja friends to come through!!! I am privileged to be in Funto’s slipstream and see her fire and love for God girls and I truly can’t wait to see all that God will do in and through His ladies in Abuja and environs!!! Great time to be a Chick who loves Jesus. The Women of the Bible days must be RED-JEALOUS haha!!!
ENLARGE the place of your tent
STRETCH your tent curtains wide
Do NOT HOLD BACK. LENGTHEN
STRENGTHEN your Stakes… Isaiah 54:2
As a Chick who is TOTALLY into Fitness,
I understand, to a large extent, what it means to stretch, and I am always telling all my students to make sure they stretch, both before and after a workout. I know stretching can be uncomfortable, painful and most of us feel we don’t have time for it, but if I am going to have better flexibility, improve my performance, maximize my muscle effectiveness, and decrease my risk of injuries, I NEED TO STRETCH!!!
But leaving physical fitness aside, I believe that God is truly calling us all to STRETCH especially if we are to enter our next level. We don’t just stroll casually into the next level, we STRETCH aka GROW into it, and that growth requires some kind of pain and discomfort.
I personally feel like I am living in one long STRETCH these days, stretching into ALL that God has for me in this season. And if we look, both with our physical eyes and the eyes of the Spirit, just a little closely, at most people with a strong sense of purpose and vision, you will see that they are constantly stretching!!!
I don’t even think I have the words for this Post but my heart is just exploding really.
If I have spoken to you in recent times personally, you would have heard me talk about this STRETCH!!!
My Sisters in TFS Academy are on various stretch projects too.
I am actually uncomfortable with the idea of playing safe and doing just what I have always done, coasting on a safe auto-pilot, and maybe people even thinking this girl is ‘all that’ but deep within me, I know I am not stretching AT ALL!!!
Let me begin this by defining STRETCH in light of this blog post, then properly expounding the Scripture I shared above
STRETCH: To be capable of being made longer and wider WITHOUT tearing or breaking.
To cause something to REACH as far as, or as long as POSSIBLE.
To extend or enlarge beyond the usual or regular limits.
People, I believe God is calling each and every one of us to STRETCH.
To do more than we usually do.
More of what, you may ask?
Well, I don’t know what ‘More’ looks like in your own world, but I certainly know what it looks like to and for me. I had to sit with myself and write out all the places where life had caused me to atrophy (and I will explain atrophy later) and start working on stretching again.
But before you jump into a stretch, there is one thing we must do first.
Even with physical fitness, you cannot stretch effectively while wearing that fitted, no-room traditional outfit. You have to ‘enter’ the right outfit first.
In this STRETCH God has called us to, we also have to ‘enter’ the right outfit. And this is where Isa 54 v 2 plays out beautifully
If I am going to stretch into all that God has called me to, then I need to make room in my life too.
You have this room that you are trying to redesign but it is cluttered, full of junk and very disorganized. You don’t just start painting it and putting in new furniture. You take time to declutter!!!
And that’s the first step.
Examine your heart and life. What is taking up so much ‘room’?
What activities and relationships are taking up so much of your time that you don’t have room to truly stretch into all that God has called you to be.
I love how Proverbs 31:16 AMP says that she expands prudently, saves TIME AND STRENGTH which she then uses to plant FRUITFUL VINES in her own vineyards.
We should take a critical look at the relationships and activities in our lives? Are they saving us time or are they causing me to waste my time with the mundane?
Take a look at what you invest STRENGTH into, both physical and EMOTIONAL ENERGY? Are they worth it?
Beef, jealousy, tryna-keep-up-with-the-Joneses, rivalry, unforgiveness, gossip, social media drama, blog hopping, self-pity, Telemundo, self-worship, Instagram and Facebook, etc.?
Mehn, some of these things may not be SIN but they are WEIGHTS and the thing about WEIGHTS is that soon, they lead to or become SIN!!!
God had to teach me that He can’t fit all He wants to do in and through me into the little space I have left. I have to MAKE ROOM for more!!!
So if we would all just make room in our lives, allow the Holy Spirit to do a deep work decluttering the junk within, we would have more room to stretch into all that God has in store for us.
To declutter means to remove unnecessary items from an over-crowded/untidy place. To simplify. To put an order to somewhere. To remove what I don’t need to make it more PLEASANT.
To get rid of the mess, disorder and complications (AKA DRAMA).
And one of my favorite words ever to use… TO DETOXIFY!!!
I would typically start any weight loss program with a detox. I give my students lots of fruits and veggies in their meal plans to rid the body of unhealthy, toxic and harmful stuff and get it to function maximally.
Which is why we begin our STRETCH too by DETOX-ing our lives.
I did this Post on DETOX which would totally help you understand it all better.
Let’s give God more room!!! He wants to do BIG STUFF for us BUT FIRST, He has to do it IN US!!!
Now moving on to the STRETCH…
2. STRETCH!!! ENLARGE!!! SPREAD OUT!!!
Now that we are in the right outfit (heart condition) for the stretch, we need to sit down and write out places where we have atrophied.
Atrophy: gradually decline in effectiveness, usefulness, or vigor due to underuse or neglect. A wasting away or deterioration.
First thing I had to do here was check my FAITH muscles and realized that if I didn’t quickly stretch ‘em, stuff would get critical.
I had to ask myself when was the last time I did something (sticking to it to the end ooo) that truly stretched my faith? TRULY ooo as in TRULY!!! Not just the one that people will hear and applaud but deep down I know that was not really a FULL LENGTH STRETCH!!!
And you know, our stretches differ per season and per person. For example, offerings in church. There was a season you could probably get away with 100naira and it was a MAJOR stretch but now, you now even 1000naira is hardly a stretch. Same way with prayers.
Before, 15minutes Quiet Time was a real stretch but now, if you spend 45mins, it may look like a big deal to some, but you know you are not stretching.
Which is why our company matters. If we keep staying in companies where you are the SUPER STAR every time, there is a tendency for you to slack and atrophy. But when you have people in your Squad who you see doing bigger things than you and not wearing out, you tend to stretch more, and more and more, and continue to give your ALL, yet you do not SNAP!!!
So check your company, and adjust as need be. I certainly am.
You don’t need to change your friends; you only need to widen your Squad!!!
How easy it can be for us to just stay riding on our old momentum and playing safe because that is what is both familiar and comfortable. But the truth is safe leads to atrophy. And we don’t want to atrophy
The truth is, most of us have way more capacity than we are currently operating on. We can stretch to a new level and NOT break because God is right in that stretch!!!
Another amazing thing about stretching is the fact that it makes me FLEXIBLE!!! The more we stretch, the more flexible we become even in doing those bigger things that we have stretched into. Then we can stretch into even more and more and more.
I recall when I started working out. Some routines were so hard. They stretched my flesh bad. It was both painful and uncomfortable. But I stuck to it.
Now those routines, like Jillian’s level 1 shred, are so easy, I can’t even do them. I am constantly looking for ‘harder’ stuff.
WHAT USED TO TAKE ME OUT AND DOWN can’t take me out again.
But if I didn’t stick it out, it would have still been a mountain to me.
However, if I keep doing it without moving to the next level, it becomes redundant and a waste of time because my body is already used to it so I need to STRETCH into harder routines.
I have a student now who is into running. I had to advise her to STOP running for a season, because her progress slowed, and gave her a variety of other workouts to do. How easy it is to find and then slip comfortably into the comfortable, never wanting to challenge ourselves even further. But if we are going to continue to bear fruits in our lives, we have to be uncomfortable enough to STRETCH into that next level.
2. DO NOT HOLD BACK. LENGTHEN. DO NOT THINK SMALL.
And this is where our FAITH MUSCLES come out to play.
When I stretch, am I stretching to my own limits or to God’s limits? I know how easy it is for us to stretch,
FEAR is the major thing that causes us to think small and hold back. FEAR waits for us at the threshold of every new level and causes us to shrink back. Oh but I have learned and I am still learning to DO IT AFRAID. Not just hash tag and post it to Social media, #DoItAfraid, but be bold enough to not limit myself to my own level.
To close my eyes and PRAY THE KIND OF PRAYERS THAT SCARE WHAT IS SCARED ON THE INSIDE OF ME like my mama Lisa Bevere taught me!!! To believe God for BIG THINGS!!! To not just believe that God can do BIG things but to believe that GOD CAN AND WANTS TO DO BIG THINGS FOR ME.
You know, my Pastor told me something recently. She said
‘…Eziaha, it is one thing to theorize about faith. Anybody can say they have faith and quote all the Scriptures but when it comes right down to LIVING by faith in very practical ways, a lot of us fail…’
I need to strengthen my atrophying faith muscles and pray BOLD PRAYERS!!! BELIEVE FOR THE IMPOSSIBLE!!!
Like Christine Caine says
IMPOSSIBLE IS WHERE GOD STARTS!!! MIRACLES ARE WHAT GOD DOES!!!
Oh I am stretching ‘em muscles. Lengthening all the way, as God allows. Not limiting God. I love this convo between Moses and God, especially God’s answer to him.
In Numbers 11, God has told Moses to tell the ‘murmurers’ that they would eat meat IN THE WILDERNESS for a whole month (since meat was their wahala), but he didn’t believe that was possible. Dude is practically asking God how HE intends to achieve that (like you and I have asked severally).
God’s answer in the ERV is PERFECT!!!
23: But the Lord said to Moses, ‘DO NOT LIMIT MY POWER! You will see that I CAN DO WHAT I SAY I CAN DO.”
And God did EVERYTHING HE SAID HE WOULD DO!!! Impossible as it seemed.
One of the biggest battles we all have to fight is the battle against CONTAINMENT.
I believe the enemy wants to ‘contain’ us at a certain level – in our minds, our faith, our actions, everything. We have to stay fighting. We have to…
3. STRENGTHEN!!! DRIVE YOUR TENT PEGS DEEP!!!
This journey to our next level will take a lot of STRENGTH. As we stretch the boundaries of our faith, we will come against several obstacles to GIVE UP… And trust me, giving up is easy. It is safe. It is comfortable.
But, if God has taught me anything, it is that I can NOT escape my faith tests. If I fail any, I am coming back to write the re-take.
Pharmacy school called it re-sits, and I recall that one stupid BIOCHEMISTRY re-sit I ever took in my year 2. BIOC is already a stupid, hard and nonsense course (You can tell my HATE GAME for that course is still going strong even after 8years lol) and then I failed it and had to re-sit.
The re-sits held during the holidays and they were an opportunity for you to pass that course or repeat the entire year. Everybody was enjoying their hols and we who failed some courses came back to write STUPID resits. It pained me walahi. And every time I think of that pain, I understand that even FAITH RE-SITS or REPEATS have to be even more painful.
When you see your mates move to the next level, and you, because you didn’t have the balls to hold on to those faith balls TO THE END, you have to take resits and sometimes even repeat an entire year. Because there will always be Faith tests per level. Except we don’t mind staying at one level for ever…
This is something I am constantly checking with myself. Am I dropping a Faith ball? Am I ready to take the more painful resit?
This weekend, as I pondered on some stretches, the Holy Spirit told me to ask Funto Ibuoye to share her BECOMING story and test of FAITH with me. You see, when I did this post on Becoming, the Holy Spirit had told me,
‘…this girl is in faith. You need to do what you can to help her faith…’
I publicized it for her. I paid for people. I prayed for her.
I DID NOT KNOW HER PERSONALLY!!!
I just obeyed the Holy Spirit. I believe that truly there is a line of EQUAL frequency in the Spirit connecting us to those with whom we must do life with…
and part of that is holding each other up when we need to…
I didn’t even know just how much she was in faith and then as she shared it with me, both of us were crying.
…How she almost dropped the ball. How she labored in prayers and work sef. How a few weeks to the event, hall paid for to accommodate 350 yet only 50-something persons had paid. How they had debts piling up yet money was not coming in. How she would go to the hall and prophesy that it will be full. How she put a FULL HALL picture on her phone so she keeps seeing it. How she just stayed believing.
And finally GOD DID IT!!!
And then outdid Himself even in their personal lives, just because He can…
She PASSED HER FAITH TEST!!!
And she kept on saying
‘…I know God is a BIG BIG BIG God and so I knew I could believe Him for BIG BIG BIG things…’
If I had a dollar for every time Funto mentioned BIG BIG BIG GOD… Phew…
Darling, I don’t know what God is calling you to EMBRACE YOUR STRETCH in but I certainly KNOW that He is calling you to EMBRACE YOUR STRETCH in something…
Maybe in your job…
Your Bible study…
Your character and tongue…
Your friendships and associations…
Ride solo for a bit…
Leave that boyfriend/girlfriend…
To start that/those project(s)
Sleep a little less
Pray a little more
Your FAITH (Now that’s a general sontin…)
Go ahead Darling,
…because you will spread abroad to the left and the right. You will grow in ALL DIRECTIONS… Isa 54:3a
Dunno about yawl but I am suddenly super uncomfortable (and BORED) with being confortable. I am tired of coasting on the same momentum. You too should. In the Words of my NUMERO UNO Joyce Meyer, ‘WE ARE NOT FULL OF THE HOLY SPIRIT TO DO A BUNCH OF EASY STUFF…’
Embrace your STRETCH.
What’s a little pain and discomfort in light of eternal PURPOSE???!!!
Wanna know what Scripture has become my new best friend?
Psalms 119: 32… Lord, ENLARGE MY HEART!!!
Oh my accountability partner Aijay Ufomadu is such a STRECTHER!!!
This Chick has a regular bank job, a family (husband and son my son’s age) and she just keeps stretching to accommodate the many dreams and visions God has given to her.
I watched her shoot and upload this video against all odds on THE PLACE OF BRANDING IN FULFILLING YOUR LIFE ASSIGNMENT
She even got Bankole Williams on it!!! Like talk about a FAITH STRETCH!!!
Then she is having her FIRST EVER PRAYER MEETING as God led her for women.
Go go go Girl!!!
Just something super attractive about a woman, or a tribe of women, RUNNING HARD after their purpose, stretching all the way AGAINST all odds. Excuses are NO MONGER VALID ooo!!!
Chase your dreams Darling!!! Everyone else is…
Of which we have redefined BUSY in TFS Academy to mean ‘Moving gracefully from one FRUITFUL activity to another’
For in His eyes, we are all Daughters #WithoutRival and this eliminates every reason we should ever compete with one other… Lisa Bevere. Without Rival
I don’t know about yawl but I’m saved enough to admit that if not for Jesus, I would have been the most selfish, competitive Bitch ever (excuse my French)
ME, MY, MINE would be the number one grammar in my vocab.
My prayers would have been mostly selfish.
Very VERY selfish.
And can I tell yawl that up until recently, they were partially selfish.
When DDK came for Warrior in Heels, part of what she said was something like
‘…if all you are praying for is yourself, then something is wrong. If prayers have not taken you to different countries and different people, then you have not started…’
I frankly didn’t know what DDK meant but because I wanted to truly KNOW, I asked God to explain it to me. I didn’t ask DDK.
You see, I had seen the whole #MiddayBabyMidday movement by Bobbie Houston of HillSong and Color Sisterhood,
and I knew they were basically praying against injustice in the world, especially against women and human trafficking, but I won’t lie, it still didn’t quite ‘enter’
Somehow, God began to explain to me what unselfish prayers looked like.
Now there is this part of praying for your friends who have shared prayer points with you. Then there is a prayer that you pray for people you don’t know, may never know, but definitely need your prayers because gurl, we are not called into isolated or selfish lives.
The biggest way God taught me this was with my son.
Every time I spoke all my plenty plenty prayers over him especially before I dropped him off at Daycare, I would feel God kinda tug me to do more…
To pray for not just him but the Child Minders, the other kids there, their parents etc.
The exact thing I was praying for me and my baby was the exact same thing I began to pray for them…
I would pray that the moms have wisdom from heaven to build their homes right and they raise their kids in the fear of the Lord. That these children walk in purpose and that the homes they grow in is being built on the foundation of God. That they know GOD from a young age and so on.
I go a step further to pray for his classmates and friends in the future when he graduates Day care into ‘real’ school. I pray into his future and the other kids I don’t even know.
Now truly I can pray that my son is ‘all that’ and I could care less about other kids and their mamas. I mean, I want for my kid to be best behaved, most intelligent, most adorable kid in his school, etc. so why pray for another mama and her kid so her kid may now be better than mine?
But God is like,
What if these kids, with whom your kids will grow, are spoilt, and ‘one kain’, would you prefer that? Wouldn’t you rather pray for the kids and parents with whom your kids will be with, that they are being trained right and in the fear of God? That your kid has a class and school full of kingdom minded kids who are saved and love Jesus from a young age and so don’t teach my kids the bad habits they pick up at home. Isn’t it better to ‘dwell together in harmony’ so your prayer points reduce?
As I got more understanding of that, I began to pray for kids everywhere really. My prayer world expanded. I don’t want to just be the mom whose kids are the BEST and then care less of what becomes of the other kids.
I believe the root of that is RIVALRY and something that is NOT love.
It is same as the kids in my compound and neighborhood.
It is easy for me to have the best behaved kids and judge ’em mamas whose kids are unruly and badly behaved.
But who judgment epp?
How bad would it be for me to pray for my sister, understanding that it is way better to have a neighborhood of kids who are well behaved and playing together? Even if you don’t let your kids play with them, someway somehow, your kids will encounter them. And even if my kids never get to roll with them, INDISCIPLINED KIDS MAKE SUPER SUPER TERRIBLE ADULTS both as wives/hubs, teachers, Doctors, etc.
Nothing hurts when our prayers are all inclusive.
Now it doesn’t matter whether or how the prayers are answered. We are just called to pray beyond selfish prayers.
What do you think the Bible means here…
I urge you, first of all, to pray for all people. Ask God to help them; intercede on their behalf, and give thanks for them… 1 Tim 2:1 NLT
I just strongly know that we need to move beyond trying to be number one and on to helping people past obstacles in their own lives so we WIN TOGETHER!!!
The simple truth is that with that kind of mentality, God will still bless us and ours.
His blessing ain’t limited or about to finish.
He has MORE THAN ENOUGH to go round!!!
I recall those University days. When someone will have one secret information about a Course and hide it under their bumbum so nobody else knows.
They won’t share their past questions or that ‘Special’ way to answer the question to fetch more marks.
I was tempted a lot to hold back some stuff as I did constant tutorials but I would just teach and share the knowledge I had till I felt drained.
Guess who still made BEST GRADUATING STUDENT and with a First Class?
My sharing did NOT hurt my blessing.
We should want more for our generation and those coming behind us. We should not drop rivalry and ‘I must get ahead’ mentality on the lap of the next generation, but instead, we help as many as we can.
WE CAN ALL LOOK GOOD TOGETHER
WE CAN ALL PROGRESS TOGETHER
In your industry, among your colleagues especially in the market place, there is a LOT of competition!!!
The world is constantly trying to pitch us against each other and make us fiercely compete, even if we have to draw blood. Everyone wants to not just get ahead, but pull her colleague down on the way up.
I recall one of my friends missing a very important test application deadline because one of her colleagues who knew about the deadline didn’t share with her, maybe because she felt the girl was going to pass and stop her own shine, as that friend of mine is super intelligent.
Under 2 years now, my friend has done that exam and is now in the system.
Look, even if it is a case of ONLY one person can ‘pass’ or ‘winner takes it all’ like The Voice Nigeria, which really is a competition, we don’t have to have a dog mentality. There can be love even in competition. Because yup, A’rese may have won but that did not come from your portion in life.
God has a plan for the life of other talents there and they too can walk into greatness even without being the Winner.
A’rese did not steal Brenda’s STAR. Or Chike’s. Or DNA’s.
She did NOT
She CAN NOT!!!
She truly just picked up her own STAR. Her STAR doesn’t diminish another’s and truth is any other person can make something huge from their singing career too. I am particularly looking forward to Brenda.
Something else struck me with The Voice Nigeria.
Personally I preferred the Top 16 performance of Timi’s Great Nation to any individual performance
In fact everyone at home agreed that it was just the best performance of all…
I think we look better together. Truly.
But let’s even leave the world, this whole competition can really be stupid, especially among the children of God. For the world, it is normal but not for us kingdom people with a kingdom mindset.
It should be more about collaboration than competition if we are jointly going to make sure the enemy has nothing on us, and that we get all the goodies God has prepared for us.
I mean, rivalry is not just stupid, but also senseless and counter-productive. (Don’t worry I am talking to me too) Nothing drives home my point than this video of the lion and the lucky buffalo…
We know the information that can help our colleagues get a promotion and enjoy good stuff but we hide and hoard. Rivalry because we have to BE BETTER and enjoy the ‘buffalo’ alone!!!
I am reminded of something I heard James and Betty Robinson say when Lisa and John Bevere were guests on the show.
James said that people would caution them in promoting the Bevere ministry so much on their show so that their TV audience don’t now take the money they want to give to the Robinson ministry and give to the Bevere ministry instead. And I love how James said there is no need to compete.
At the end of the day, it is God’s work and God has enough to FUND each of them without depleting what He wants to give others.
Let’s stop making God look like His supply is limited. Because it is NOT!!!
You have access to information that can make life easier for someone but you keep it, and enjoy it alone. Heaven forbid we share. As if a blessing on their life is debited from your own bank account…
Now I need to highlight that point above which I learned from Lisa Bevere MY LIFE HERO…
A Blessing on your Sister’s life is NOT taken out of your Bank account. God has enough for all His children. As we share, He even expands our world.
I am frankly tired of the competition I see in the world today. I still heard someone in church yesterday say ‘…but he is my competition’.
My heart broke.
We limit God when we get into all that pettiness. We are trying to tell Him He doesn’t have it within Him to take care of all His children.
Ah, that Lisa Bevere’s statement reset my head.
And you know, I didn’t get it from the Book. Let me tell you what I do when I see a new book or movie that I love but I do not have access to yet.
I go and read up interviews and posts about it. That’s what I did or I am still doing. I heard her say this line during an interview. Heaven knows how many times I re-wound that part of the video.
‘…We need to stop looking at each other as though a blessing on them was taken from our bank account because we are created WITHOUT RIVAL…’
I just can’t with the kinda wisdom that comes from Lisa Bevere.
She has my number…. FOREVER!!!
I recall when I started my business. The devil has and still throws me some ‘competition’ vibes. He makes me feel like other Chicks or guys in my line of biz are my competitor. I recall when I met Dr. Donald Olu of DTrimmers on Inspiration FM.
I loved how just totally welcoming he was to me as a newbie in the Fitness world. Said he had gone through my blog, loved my devotional, asked and encouraged me to get certified, which I was already on and we just flowed.
I heard of someone else yesterday who was complaining about how an older colleague treated her when she just started her biz and went to him. He was even going to do her dirty.
I know there is temptation to be competitive with others in your field and people don’t even help when they start comparing and saying this and that but we have to RISE ABOVE SUCH PETTINESS!!!
The devil has such a divisive spirit and doesn’t like brethren especially dwell together in unity, so he throws all those silly thoughts in my head but I am quick to counter it. My mind is not his dumping ground so I ain’t letting him put any trash in.
Joyce Meyer says when those thoughts drop in, say out loud
‘THAT IS STUPID’
And then counter it.
That don’t mean I am stupid, that just means I am wise enough to discern a stupid thought and stop it from taking root
2Corinthians 10:5b says we take EVERY THOUGHT and purpose captive into the obedience of Christ…
The Message captures my thought perfectly, especially when we back up a bit…
3-6 The world is unprincipled. It’s dog-eat-dog out there! The world doesn’t fight fair. But we don’t live or fight our battles that way—never have and never will. The tools of our trade aren’t for marketing or manipulation, but they are for demolishing that entire massively corrupt culture. We use our powerful God-tools for smashing warped philosophies, tearing down barriers erected against the truth of God, fitting every loose thought and emotion and impulse into the structure of life shaped by Christ. Our tools are ready at hand for clearing the ground of every obstruction and building lives of obedience into maturity.
I especially love how it says ‘tearing’ and then ‘fitting’
It just makes me happy to see that with some effort, I can ‘arrange’ myself. I don’t have to just let ‘whatever will be will be’ and be living in rivalry with my sisters, whether in the same line of business as me or not, just because I think they are progressing faster in life than me.
But I go even further than countering; I start to pray for the person’s business, job or ministry.
I pray that people connected to me are running in purpose, running hard after the assignment God has given them. I pray that their arms are strengthened and they do not drop ‘faith balls’.
That they are filled with wisdom on how to walk this Faith journey.
Oh I pray they we all are successful at whatever we do and we all have careers and businesses that are compatible with our Faith, and that we brand and tag every single thing we do PROUDLY CHRISTIAN whether we are selling bracelets or helping people stay in shape.
We carry Jesus proudly and make Him famous!!!
It has not always been like this for me, I confess.
There was a time I had such a beef/competitive/comparison filled life and I blogged some about it here (Authentically me and Surprisingly Satisfied, one of the BEST posts I ever blogged). I wasn’t praying for nobody.
I was just so dissatisfied with my life and I was in this stupid race where I thought people had gone ahead of me and I couldn’t really celebrate anything that looked like progress from their end.
Trust me when I say God did a deep work in me and had to excavate all that nonsense from me so he could grow this beautiful garden that my life is becoming.
No, I am not perfect and I sometimes find myself entering into ‘competition mode’ and then I catch myself quickly and REPENT!!!
I cast down the STUPID thought.
Sisters, we have a world to reach.
We have a devil to keep under our feet and not allow to escape like that buffalo while we rival ourselves. We don’t have time for drama. We fight and honey, ain’t no weapon stronger than LOVE. No wonder the Bible says LOVE NEVER FAILS!!! And please I am stopping myself from starting another blog post on LOVE NEVER FAILS right now!!!
Joel 2 also gives us some kind of perspective on this war we are in and how we are all part of this great invincible Army and even though we have our different roles to play, we all have to STAY IN FORMATION and drop rivalry fast…
7ff The invaders charge.
They climb barricades. Nothing stops them.
Each soldier does what he’s told,
So disciplined, so determined.
They don’t get in each other’s way.
Each one knows his job and does it.
Undaunted and fearless,
If you back up a bit, you see how powerful this Army is and how NOTHING can stop them and the verses above just tell me why this Army is truly invincible!!!
Each one knows her job and DOES IT and without getting in each other’s way.
Instead they do what God has told them individually, Yes, but still as a part of this UNBEATABLE ARMY!!!
Ah!!! I actually had to carry myself for a retreat where God explained it to me.
I am very intentional about praying that the various people in my life are not just walking but RUNNING HARD after purpose.
You know, one of my best friends has this thing for young girls, secondary school kids and all. So I saw a flyer on Facebook for her program
and the first thing the devil tells me is ‘so she had a program and she didn’t tell you IN DETAIL FIRST yet you find it on Facebook?’
Can you imagine that stupid thought?
If I wasn’t born again, devil would have had a PRIME CANDIDATE in me haha.
You need to know that not every thought that drops in your head is yours ooo.
A lot is from the devil and while we can’t stop the bastard from dropping thoughts, we don’t take it…
We take NO thought… 2Cor 10:5
And then we also learn to YELL A LOUD NO to the devil
James 4:7 …Yell a loud no to the Devil and watch him scamper. Say a quiet yes to God and He’ll be there in no time… The Message!!! (Yes we are all now in LOVE WITH THE MESSAGE version)
Mehn, I turned all that nonsense thought upside down and started to pray for the program. That the program will bless every young lady who comes and snatch any souls from the clutches of the enemy and that it is so successful and that my Booski continues to run hard after purpose and Jesus and she is strengthened for the journey and so on.
Then I rang her later that evening (mentally remembering that both our lives are fast paced and while we have a general idea of what we are both working on and what we are in faith for so we can pray for one another, we don’t always have all the finer details) and asked her for details and encouraged her through it as she shared her challenges and fears and victories and we updated on each other’s lives and so on.
See how the devil wanted to come and how I dealt him a black eye and then some… hahahahaha.
See ehn, we have to actively deal with satan ooo. We don’t just stay neutral. We go further to do something positive from the negative he intended because we are all daughters of a God unlimited in both His love and His resources and so we should be WITHOUT RIVAL!!!
Let me end with another story that happened over this weekend.
Shredder Gang, whose real name is Bunmi and who had inspired me FROM A DISTANCE, on my own weight loss journey, had invited me twice now for a fellowship she runs, and on those two occasions, I could not go.
Now Shredder and 1 are in the same line of Fitness business, and of course, the devil will want to make you feel like you are competing but both of us for some reason just became personal friends instead, understanding that we are CO-LABORERS and not RIVALS because we are both ‘crazy God lovers’ too.
I actually would always pray for her and her biz and her ministry and her walk with God and everything good for her. I just felt such a connection with her but I walked wisely in building that relationship because we need Squad Definitions too ooo.
Anyways, third invite and I could make it (especially cos she and Funto threatened me haha)
And oh my gosh!!! The moment I walked into that Sisterhood, I felt at home. I didn’t know these Sisters from NO WHERE but it felt like we had been connected since forever. I felt at ease. I could truly fellowship with them, lifting holy hands without fear or drama. (Yawl know I HATE drama)
I saw women share the Word in very practical ways and give words of knowledge and just correct each other in love, and accept correction and just BE POWERFUL together!!!
And then God, nicely brought to my remembrance something I had BEGGED HIM FOR ALL YEAR!!!
I had been asking God to bring me ‘deep rich authentic friendships within the body of Christ’ Now I have a lot of pretty Squad but most are vertical either upward (with my mentors) or downward (with my mentees). I wanted a tribe of women who ‘when we get together, I want to encourage you in your faith BUT I also want to be encouraged by yours…’ which is the Sisterhood goal!!! Ah!!!
I didn’t want mentoring. I had that covered. I wanted the strength that comes from just women having this very mutual horizontal thing going.
I had been tempted severally to start this on the platform of my blog but I always knew that God didn’t release me to.
See how God used Shredder to meet a deep intimate need in my life.
I left that meeting just totally refreshed and adopted into a family. What if I was being Team Petty and didn’t open myself up to friendship with Bunmi?
Or what if she was the one being Petty? I believe it was my praying for her that even prompted her to ask me to join the Sisterhood.
I am so excited about my new sisters in Christ (the feeling is mutual) and even though I am not going to be close to everyone, I know that there are some amazing women with whom I will be doing life and ministry intimately for a LONG LONG time.
You see ehn, we are not called to live in isolation. God has called us all to connect with each other but if we see ourselves as Rivals, we just may be putting off a testimony.
If you really need help with overcoming pettiness, cattiness, and rivalry, Lisa Bevere’s latest book WITHOUT RIVAL will help you. I PROMISE YOU!!!
Lisa is a writer that truly wrecks nonsense out of you!!! Plus she too has dealt with rivalry and comparing herself with other female preachers like her especially when she didn’t make the cut of the Most influential Female preachers in America a few years back and was so hurt by it. Of course, she has grown way beyond that and wants to help us…
I tell you, her Book shook me too. It made my resolve stronger to live with my fellow sisters WITHOUT RIVAL!!!
Nobody Rivalry epp ooo…
You can order her book here as it is releasing today yaaaaaaay. You can also find an e-copy because we all know it is not landing Naija for a LONG time haha. I have my e-copy already and I am just preparing my mind for the work it will further do.
You can download the first two chapters here too and enjoy. I tell you, Chapter 1 blew me away.
And if you read to this point, you just read a mini Book. Me sef I taya for me!!! Hahahahahahahaha
I love yawl too…
But really though, I strongly know that the WITHOUT RIVAL message is God’s heart for now. The Father wants us to co-labor without rivalry and bring in the ready harvest. We don’t even have enough active Laborers and we need everyone on deck and not being P E T T Y!!!
Can I get an AMEN!!!
And we end the #PropheticMotherhood with what the very beautiful Nneka Kyari said.
First, let me give a background of Nneka!!!
She actually lives in Bonny island so even before the program, when I told Aku’m who was coming, he said he knows her and that she’s launching her book in Bonny that weekend or so.
Nneka Kyari authored ‘Breaking through the haze…how I overcame infertility.’
Two things made me sorta underrate the import of her session personally… and it feels good to know I was NOT alone lol
First thing, I don’t have that problem but I thought I will just listen on behalf of, and then buy the book for someone. I frankly didn’t think she would touch me like that but I had an open spirit for anything.
Secondly, when you hear someone authored a book like this, I dunno about you but first thing I’m thinking is she must have been believing God for a looooooooooong time, maybe 8 to 15years with plenty stories and a HUGE testimony.
When I heard she waited four years, I’m like ‘…oooooooooooooo k……..‘. Then she dropped a line that just sounded like a bomb in my spirit
But before then, lemme back up a bit so we really catch the gist.
So Nneka is well aware she has an infertility problem.
Oh btw, she talks about FRUITFULNESS being beyond just children and she had a beautiful Rhema she shared from Genesis 1:28 and because BE FRUITFUL is such a theme in my life, I caught it.
Ok so the devil has brought a battle right to her dormot.
Having battled with it a while, home and abroad, she gets tired and decides to do something about it and so enter
THE POWER OF FOCUS
Not everytime, multi-task. Juggle. Etc. Recall what Priscilla Shirer said about BALANCE here
Nneka knew that split-focus in this matter would not give her the results she so desired. And so as led by God, SHE RESIGNED HER JOB to give this battle the right attention.
TO F O C U S
And this quote she gave right here hit all the right notes in my spirit.
‘…most goals in life do NOT have to take FOREVER. if I didn’t focus and give this battle the RIGHT attention, I may have still been waiting till today…’
Bet you’ve never heard a sermon like that. That Rhema hit home in that room.
That’s like turning something on its head.
‘…No, no, I’m not here to tell you how I waited 15years. I’m here to tell you how I would have waited maybe 15years but I fought and cut my journey to 4years and this is how you can cut yours short too…’
I’m all for Holy Spirit inspired shortcuts with wisdom. No glory in sufferhead. When a battle comes to your dormot, Focus!!! Deal with it. Win. And then move on once and for all.
Oh but Nneka didnt quite understand what God meant when He told her to focus, because now jobless, she filled herself with SOOOOOOOOOO MANY church activities!!!
Enter Christine Caine who by the way is a CHURCH GIRL through and through.
Numerous Christian ACTIVITY does not compensate for an AUTHENTIC RELATIONSHIP with God…CC
Kyari said ‘…being active in church does not auto equal a stronger relationship with God…’
Head of Sunday school, Committee member of dis n dat, Secretary, women’s miseries ministeries, etc. Then she also started her own business.
Still no focus. Just too much activity. Then God gave herLuke 10:38 Only ONE thing is necessary…
Give attention to your relationship with God. He is looking for INTIMACY and it is in that place of intimacy that she would get the required strategies to battle infertility.
Then she got serious and cut down sooooo many unnecessary activities. There’s only so much one can do per time if one is going to enjoy intimacy with God.
Then God started to download. I love how she shared it systematically with us in such a short time.
Number one: GUARD YOUR HEART. She needed a PURE heart. It is only on the platform of a pure heart that God does the miraculous. Holiness is very key in receiving the password of your life. She used the story of Jesus who even when He was persecuted, He forgave and kept His heart clean and then He could do the IMPOSSIBLE… Rise from the dead.
From a pure heart, you can hear God speak to you.
I ABSOLUTELY UNDERSTAND THIS THING.
You know, I am working on something HUGE and as I prayed and basically sought God concerning directions, I felt Him say I/we should start with a HOLINESS study and I’m like HUH? But clearly, He let me know that He needs us to be HOLY first before He can start to show Himself. Which was where the Post Open Heart Surgery came from. I felt like Nneka read that post lol
Then from that foundation, God began to give her more directions on what to do and LEARN the DISCIPLINE OF DOING which was her NUMBER TWO.
Don’t wish for a result, DO!!! You can’t even pray and confess without DOING.
She had to be disciplined enough to DO
She had to start feeding her body with the RIGHT DIET. She made her meals herself. Plenty veggies and she had to make sure she cooked them well enough to preserve the nutrients.
She started exercising too.
See why you need our services at #SavedFitnFAB ?
I mean, she had to be DISCIPLINED ENOUGH, sacrifice a LOT and just DO!!!
Honey, guess who got her results in THREE MONTHS???
She got pregnant and she gave birth to TWINS!!!
Reminds me of Dr Ada’s testimony, the Ebola survivor. She was disciplined enough to do what she had to do in addition to her faith. Very very disciplined. And she also got her results.
Won’t you rather FOCUS, be disciplined enough to do what God has asked you to do, win the battle and then MOVE ON??? Do you want to stay at the same battle ground fighting the same battle FOREVER? All this split focus can NOT help anybody ooo, especially NOT you. Or me!!! It takes FOCUS to achieve RESULTS. Which is exactly what she said she told a friend who has a ‘special needs’ child.
Very demanding and stressful taking care of the child, especially the diet so she is not consistent and so the problem persists. She had to tell her that wouldn’t she rather focus on this problem, be disciplined enough to do whatever it entails, get the victory and finally move on???
This makes all the sense abeg. This is not even about infertility alone, it is a lesson for LIFE because there is always something to fight for/against.
I loved the wisdom in this which is why I tweeted that she basically liberated me from a battle I would not have to face which is WASTING TIME ON BATTLES we can easily focus on and win. I’m like pumped to take on battles with the FOCUS it deserves so that we can get it under our belt and MOVE DA HECK ON!!!
I was so super blessed by Nneka. Such a communicator. She shared her story in details so that we KNOW what to do, as God leads you ooo not to ape her. Because really, God will not call every woman to resign her job but there is a required FOCUS and DISCIPLINE required for your won battle.
And because she began on the foundation of fruitfulness, she gave us some other tips to being fruitful.
Goodness!!! Don’t you just feel FRUITFUL reading all she had to say. The Book title doesn’t do it enough justice abeg. The matter is about infertility and then sooooo much more.
Let me just repeat this point which I thought was the BIGGEST!!!
‘…Most goals in life do NOT have to take FOREVER. If I didn’t focus and give this battle the RIGHT attention, I may have still been waiting till today…’
Nneka is ONE DEEEEEEEEEEP WOMAN. Plus she’s beautiful too. She is 10 YEARS in marriage this year and her twins are 5. A boy and a girl. Who knows maybe she would have still been waiting today if she didn’t strap herself in and FIGHT!!!
What battles have arrived at your dormot today? Do you want to stay fighting it FOR EVER? Me I certainly do NOT!!!
So, go sit before the LORD and download what He wants you to DO, then FOCUS on it, cut out unnecessary activities and be DISCIPLINED ENOUGH TO DO because RESULTS DO NOT COME BY ACCIDENT!!!
And that’s how we have come to the end of this beautiful series on Prophetic Motherhood.
I have enjoyed writing it AND reading it too. I purposely did NOT listen to the CD again to write. I just transcribed from what I wrote down and then what my Spirit highlighted. If I listened to the CD, this would have gone on FOREVER lol because every point resonated. I wanted to FORGET some things on purpose LOL. Ehen, now I can go listen to the CD again and again and again. It is actually over 3hours long because practically the ENTIRE program- WORD, PRAYERS, CHARGE, ETC was recorded. Gosh I LOVE DEBORAH INITIATIVE FOR WOMEN!!! (DIW). That atmosphere of prayer, fellowship, and word was REAL!!!
Now, a LOT of people really want me to share the prayer points and scriptures used to pray there. I actually was going to do that until God told me to do ONE BETTER… let’s do our very own 30DAY DEVOTIONAL for the FAB WARRIOR MOMS.
Like, can you absolutely BELIEVE that????
I AM SO EXCITED!!!
I was actually going to do it for myself taking from the ones shared at WARRIOR IN HEELS (Mehn, there was this one on ‘My kids are ESTABLISHED in RIGHTEOUSNESS Pastor M led that gets me leaping every time), Prophetic Motherhood and then my Personal study , because I wanted some STRUCTURE AND STRATEGY to my prayer as a PROPHETIC WARRIOR MOM but I don’t mind sharing with yawl.
Don’t thank me, thank Christine Caine. Lol.
And about this hug, let’s give the short version. DDK hugged me what I thought was a FINALLY WE MEET hug and then starts praying. Let’s just make it even shorter by saying that despite all my ‘inner resistance’ Aunty’s anointing gets me to the floor.
You would think Aunty would let me be ooo but after I get up, she continues the hug and prayers.
Receiving quotient Hahaha
Some things are taught. Some things are CAUGHT!!! I KNOW that I caught something. I got home and all the crazy ideas started dropping in my spirit and I kicked off immediately… Neighborhood Stay at home moms prayer meetings, the devotional, and just plenty FIRE!!!
The last couple of days (after the meeting) have been a FIGHT. Don’t let me go into details haha. I just keep remembering Debola’s line of
‘…the thing that is confronting you is serious business. You may NOT be paying attention to it BUT it is paying attention to you…’
But the devil stays losing. NO TIME!!! I don’t even believe I did these posts back to back.
Please don’t come back tomorrow though for the devotional. I am already working on it and will present it in a format where you can download and share. Yaaaaay!!!
Let’s get this work done people. Let’s checkmate the devil.
Just RUN after everything God has called you to do.
Don’t even waste time. Don’t second guess. Don’t let anyone talk you out of it. Just RUN!!! You have a part to play in this divine relay so STOP SLACKING or UNDERESTIMATING YOUR PART. I am so thankful mama pushed me to get out of my comfort zone and start #SavedFitnFAB. Just stepping out to do that has unleashed someone else.
Like Debola said, there is a line of EQUAL FREQUENCY in the Spirit connecting us to those with whom we MUST do destiny with.
May you find your Prophets, guys. May you find your Elizabeths.
And may you be a PROPHETIC ‘MOTHER’ indeed!!!
How are we warming up for Love Life?
Release your faith Chick if you feel GOD is leading you to
So I did this marriage interview here. I actually sound mature here looooool
There’s a Part 1 here
#PropheticMotherhood… What DDK said
This series builds up so start from there aii?
Pastor Dotun Arifalo is the ‘Father’ over the ministry, Deborah Initiative for Women. She basically got me born again all over AGAIN!!!
I didn’t believe all that was coming out of that woman!!!
Let’s just jump in…
Every woman is a PROPHET!!! The prophetic anointing is on me as a woman so it means there is limitless power in my WORDS!!!
Hello all the women/mamas jumping from prophet to prophet to ‘see’ for them. You are a PROPHET hun!!! Beyond speaking LIFE into my children, I can speak life into my husband, into his dreams, into my ideas, into my business, etc. I use my words to create/birth what I sense in my heart and because my words are anointed, I have to be very careful what I speak. I can speak life or I can speak death. I can be a wife or a knife!!!
Being a woman is an OFFICE!!! It is an ORDINATION!!! I can stand in that office and declare things and heaven MUST answer.
I can give life to things beyond children and the entire power lies in my words.
As a woman, I am both a King maker (as I take those seeds in me and make kings of them) and a KING and kings declare so I have to make sure I ain’t using my mouth to talk nonsense or nag.
My words are very powerful.
She also took some time to speak to the Singles.
The greatest gift you can give yourself is the gift of the right man
Don’t go and hook up with someone who will make you start speaking nonsense words ooo.
As a prophetic mother, MOMMY MINISTRY is NOT your ONLY ministry. So as I raise my kids, I should NOT pack up my life permanently.
And permit me to unpack this a bit with the Proverbs 31 woman as God explained it to me one morning.
I was having this convo with God some 3weeks back about Full time stay-at-home mama’s. I actually believe I have an assignment for women in that category and my inbox confirms it (yawl keep writing me). I felt He was telling me that being a FT stay-at-home mom AND NOTHING ELSE is not exactly ALL that He wants for His women and so He got me to draw a line in my journal and open Proverbs 31 in various versions.
On one side, I filled in her jobs in the home and the other side, her jobs outside the home.
I then realised that indeed, that Chick excelled BOTH as a homemaker/domestic queen and a Career woman.
That day, I was CONVINCED that really ehn, your life MUST count for more than just you, your husband and your kids. Yes there are times when you may wanna FOCUS on your home (and i’ll dwell a bit on that with the 3rd speaker Nneka Kyari) but honey, as a woman, you have been called to MUCH MORE!!!
As a woman, you can NOT afford to be weak!!! You birth what you are. It is in your genes, strength or weakness. A weak woman will birth weak children. A strong woman will birth strong children. Raising a child is like raising an ARMY!!! You have to be STRONG!!!
Ok, you need to go back and read that again!!!
Woman, YOU BIRTH WHO YOU ARE!!!
There is a difference between a child growing up and a child being raised!!! Some children just grow up, some are RAISED!!! We need to be intentional and consciously RAISE our kids. You are a custodian of destiny. You can’t do it casually.
Aunty, it is advisable to wait some time after marriage to born ehn.
PLAN for ’em kids. Get enough emotional support. Be READY!!! You don’t have to jump from wife to mother immediately. Build your relationship with your husband first. Groom yourself for the journey. Build capacity before you bring forth. It is a HUGE job.
Remember, who you are is who you birth ooo.
Again, don’t pack up your life permanently to raise your kids. Beyond being known as Bolaji Olojo’s wife or ‘mama KingDaveed’ (and side eye to yawl who call me that), I need to be a mama of many other things beyond children ooo. There are ministries, business ideas, etc waiting to be birthed through me!!!
Today’s women WORK beyond housework ooo.
Dear woman, Get Help.
Leverage on every opportunity you get/God has given. FOCUS on doing what only you can do and outsource what others can do for you. Cooking and cleaning and being spent from these activities such that you don’t even spend quality time pouring into your kids can’t help anybody ooo. You will just be frustrated and resentful and tired meanwhile the real job has not been done. And might I add that spending time on Telemundo and co because you have Help can NOT help anybody too. Raise up and call forth the LEADER in your kids.
Tz beyond cooking and cleaning.
And tz definitely beyond Telemundo and Zee world.
Quick question: if you do NOT cook personally, will the world come down? NO!!!
But will the world come down if you do NOT RAISE your kids? Pretty much YES!!! Your own world will come down.
Your kids ought to see you both as mom AND mentor/role model. Teach your kids to approach the world with a problem solving mentality.
Take your kids with you on spiritual journies. Let them see you pray, study the Word, and live for Jesus!!!
Let them learn how to pray from watching and hearing you. Not everytime Telemundo and Africa Magic or TRACE!!!
Stop joking dear woman!!! The devil you are not paying attention to is paying MAJOR attention to you.
(that’s from DDK anyways I dunno why I added it here but, HERE, you can have it)
Brainwash your kids with the Word from a young age.
Teach them values, life skills, marriage, relationships, etc.
Train them to discern so they don’t marry wrong. Let your marriage be THE blueprint for them. The stuff I put into my kids is the stuff they produce. Use the creative power of my words to frame it all together.
Keep laying hands on them.
You, my darling are a Prophet!!!
Oh this next point chilled me, and then pumped me.
She said the reason some of us are not running to our parents a lot is that they are not mentor figures to us. We just grew up. We were not RAISED!!!
There’s nothing really to learn from them. (and that’s not a reason to not visit ooo). You mama, have to live your life in such a way that generations after you can NOT forget you. You know how the Bible says ‘…one generation shall tell the next of YOUR faithfulness…’ ehen. Let one generation tell the next generation that there was an Eziaha who no one can stop talking about.
Your impact down generations should neither be denied or erased.
You are a trailblazer, woman!!!
Be a TRAILBLAZER!!!
Let your kids arise and call you BLESSED!!! Please give your ALL in raising your kids, and that involves birthing the other dreams God has given you. Do it for your generation. Any battle you do not win, you will transfer. Let some nonsense STOP in your lineage because of you and your prayers.
Until you begin to do that, you are ORDINARY!!!
Lemme just round up this post with this
Mama, you are LIMITLESS!!!
See ehn, raising kids is awesome. I actually believe it is my primary responsibility. Primary, but NOT only!!! You don’t wanna conquer ‘out there’ and fail as a mom.
You also don’t wanna be a WIFE and MOM and NOTHING else!!!
Lisa Bevere and Christine, on the platform of ‘Propel Women’ talk about the ‘Emerging woman’ a lot. God wants an emerging of a woman whose life is INTEGRATED. Whole!!! It is NOT an either-or, it is a BOTH thing. A woman who wants her life to count for something beyond her!!!
Something for the benefit of mankind!!! These women understand SEASONS in life.
I talked about my seasons here too. I had my FT stay-at-home mama season and frankly, what God did for me then was building capacity!!! What I thought was a low-output season was a ‘root deepening’ season. And maybe a season of REST too like my bestie Valerie told me on Sunday when I told her I was tired and all. As a woman, you need to be UNSTUCK, be able to maximise each season and then MOVE gracefully from one season to the next as God leads you.
If all you are doing now screams ‘low productivity’, I promise you, with the help of the Holy Spirit, you can make that season work for you and prepare you for the next season. But if you let your life be encumbered with Africa Magic and Telemundo, you can NOT hear God.
See this Propel woman, Alli Worthington, she’s easily my favourite on the Panel.
Years and years and years (over 10years) as a FT mom, raising 5 boys (she said her and her husband were just ‘enjoying themselves’ and wham!!! 5boys!!!) but today, she’s Exec Director at PropelWomen, Author, Speaker, Entrepreneur etc and she did NOT stop being a wife and mom as she took on these other responsibilities BUT instead being a stay-at-home MOM enriched her life in such a way that as that season morphed into another, she took lessons from there and is doing a MOST brilliant job in this season and inspiring loads of women around the world including ME!!!
One of you who came for Warrior in heels should transcribe na. Epp us. Haha. I’m still amazed by DDK. I’m reading one of her books THE SCRIPT and what it is doing to me is beyond Words.
Please don’t despise any season. God can work with anything if we give it to HIM!!! Like Alli said, take care of what’s in front of you right now faithfully. God has a plan!!! Follow it and not the world’s. He will take you into your next season soon enough.
Honey, you can do MORE than birthing kids. You can BIRTH much more!!!
And this is a good place to end ‘…what Pastor Dotun said…’
And the final speaker was Nneka Kyari!!!
Soft spoken and yet deeeeeeepppp!!! A woman who took a season of her life by the lapels, fought the battle against infertility, won it, and morphed into another season and is liberating lots of other women!!!
Eeeeeeeek!!! Nneka was my fave because she taught me something I will NEVER forget.
That post is READY too!!! Come back tomorrow!!!
Plus I have a BIG announcement at the end of Part 3.
Think… download, use for 30days, repeat, share… I can’t wait to birth that!!! Anybody wanna guess???
See you soooooooooooon!!!
I dunno about yawl but I am plenty excited about 2016!!!
God has been speaking to me in the CLEAREST of ways tz ridiculous. It is like my life is all coming together and I can’t wait for all that God is gonna do…
I have been journaling and journaling stuff God has been telling me because I don’t wanna forget A THING and while He has spoken directly to my spirit A LOT, He has also spoken through people.
One of such people is STEPHANIE OBI.
Babe is one of my longest standing friends from primary school. I think I still keep in touch with just two of them directly(Hi Omoruwa) and then maybe another 2 on Facebook.
Girlfriend’s story is such an inspiration and you should visit her blog AND SUBSCRIBE to read it all up, because I recall when two of us used to be sooo confused about life haha even though we knew we had A LOT to offer the world. Crazy times. Haha. I recall when I failed outta pharmacy school and she used to be so super encouraging and all. I recall LONG phonecalls and all that stuff. Interestingly, we would both go on to make First class degrees.
So she rang me up a couple of days after my birthday this year and we were talking about this and that until she said THE EXACT SAME WORD GOD GAVE ME ON MY BIRTHDAY for my next level. Btw, I am going to be sharing what God told me and how it has all been coming together early in the new year. And another btw, she is s BELIEVER and attends Pastor Poju’s CCC.
When she said that, something in my spirit JUMPED!!! She kept saying ‘Eziaha, you have something to offer the world. You have a story. People need to hear your story. Your blog can do much better’ and all such encouraging stuff. She was genuinely happy that I quit my job because she knew I was more than that and she recommended tons of materials I could go buy that would take me to the next level. It was like God sent her to me that day cos we spoke for like an hour and my spirit was just jumping. It was sooo crazy that when I slept, I dreamt of an even clearer picture of my vision. You know that kinda dream that you wake up, grab your journal and start writing.
I am absolutely excited at how Steph’s life is going. I follow her blog, newsletters and all her social media accounts. and I pray for her almost everyday because she is one of those God really used to JOLT ME!!! (I don’t think she knows all of this like this ooo lol) and I really want her BLOWING because God is using her life to teach me a beautiful lesson in my own life.
Anyhoos, why all this long story?
Because I feel bad that I have not shared all the good stuff from Steph with yawl on my blog aside from that feature I did here back then on her Ankara business. I believe that there are some certain people who need the story that Steph is sharing, via her God given gift, with the world today. A lot of yawl need to birth purpose. Something in you needs to blow and your head is just spinning but you don’t know how to put it all together and you feel like you are stuck in some kinda rut. Or job. Haha.
Now today is your favoured day because Steph is in and she’ll fix you up and on Thursday Dec 31, she is having a VISION BOARD ONLINE PARTY!!!
It is actually free to subscribers of her blog but only for a limited period so go go subscribe so you can join in the fun. The kinda fun that clarifies purpose and vision.
I dunno for how long it would be free, probably a couple of days and babe charges PLENTY money to get these stuff later ooo.
Look guys, it is one thing to paste pictures on a board, and it is another thing to know what to do to make those pictures come to pass. Come let Steph show you how…(lol I sound like a paid publicist. Haha. I wish. She does not even know I am doing this)
It was while I was praying last night about 2016 and all it holds and stuff I want on my vision board that God just told me to go share this on my blog so that my FAB community can learn too. I was going to share it with a couple of my mentees only. Infact I had written down their names in my diary to ring them. I certainly wasn’t planning on typing any more posts this year aside my THANK YOU post (which is coming next year because God would have me share something else with yawl).
Don’t just sit there and say ‘Who is this girl sef that Eziaha is gushing about and what does she know that she is shining teeth anyhow?’
Honey, forget if she is small or has small mouth, just come for the Party and thank me later. Btw, she actually has a pretty tidy resume incase you are one for qualifications and stuff. Plus she making millions tooooooo. (cant find that post to hyperlink jare)
Some of yawl focus on the minors and miss your blessing. Like I said, I have known babe for at least 22years but I ain’t messing with familiarity and all. Because when God sends you YOUR HELPERS, you cannot afford to be familiar.
See yawl at the VISION BOARD PARTAYYYYY!!! Go get all the details from her blog.
Invite your friends too. Don’t enjoy it alone.
I have so many visions for the year and on a lighter note, one of it is ABS!!!
By my baby’s first birthday, I must get ABS… #VisionMARCH!!!
Which is why I am ready to go with Jillian’s challenge
even though just watching this video made me cry lol
One last AMAZING post and then we kiss 2015 goodbye… Come back at 10am on the 31st dawleens…
Love yawl and God certainly loves you CRAZZZZYYYY!!!
There was a certain afternoon a LOT of things began to change in my life. August 31.
I had just finished shutting the door behind the woman who came to do my hair and right at that gate, God spoke to me in a way I could NEVER have missed…
You see, all the while she was doing my hair, I had already started my detox so TV was off and I was watching some videos on YouTube from my fave preachers…
So as I turned from the gate, God said to me SOOOO CLEARLY
Eziaha, YOU are EXACTLY WHERE I WANT YOU TO BE…THIS IS WHAT YOU SHOULD BE DOING…
And He went ahead to download the THISes, that is next few steps of my life to me…
I lost NO TIME
Phew, journal out and I started writing because I knew if I didn’t write at that point, I would forget it.
I wrote and wrote and wrote as He spoke to my spirit and when I was done, I said a prayer and I WAS LED to call a friend later on and we spoke for a long time as I downloaded some of what I had heard to her (I also needed to hear myself say those things haha)
Note, I said I was LED to ring her and her reaction was proof enough that I WAS LED… I didn’t just jump to the phone and phone a friend.
Let me tell you, when God speaks, IT COMES WITH INCOMPREHENSIBLE P E A C E!!!
Will all the storms go away? Nope. But you, like JESUS, can be asleep on a pillow while the storm rages and then when you wake, you still the storm because you have a WORD!!!
Brace yourself guys, THIS IS GOING TO BE ONE LOOOOOOONNNNGGGG post…
I see yawl snicker, roll your eyes and be like
‘ E’ your posts are always long so puh-leeeeezeeee…’
Ok ooo. don’t say I didn’t warn ya.
Now before then, I used to be sooooooo unhappy lol. Not physically as much as mentally and spiritually. I wrote about it at the end of this Post.
You see, being a mom had CHANGED MY LIFE in many ways and for the most part, I ALWAYS FELT IT WAS HINDERING ME SOMEHOW…
Please read again, FELT… Past tense!!!
I just couldn’t WAIT to kick my career off again. I had BIG dreams and I was going to take over the world.
But my current days were full of diapers, breast pumps, bottles, onesies and frustrations…
Trust me looking back now, I am actually laughing.
Then, when my friends would share stuff with me or just publicly on SM via pictures or posts about work, career and all, I would feel bad that MEHN, see this girl/guy moving on ooo and see me just here… Kai aye mi
Heck, I even used to BEEF my hubs for having a career going on while me I just stayed home all day long.
I couldn’t WAIT for this SEASON TO BE OVER and along with that came mega frustrations!!!
Now let’s go back to what God told me
Eziaha, YOU are EXACTLY WHERE I WANT YOU TO BE…THIS IS WHAT YOU SHOULD BE DOING…
It SLAPPED the CRAP outta me.
Before I formed you in the womb, I KNEW and APPROVED of you (as my chosen instrument) and BEFORE you were born, I HAD PLANS FOR YOU…
You made me, You created me. Now give me THE SENSE to FOLLOW Your commands.
As He shared with me what I was to be doing with my time NOW, I knew I needed to BE AN ACTIVE PARTICIPANT in MY OWN RACE and stop being an observer in other people’s race.
Oh how complicated we make life when we start to compare and contrast with somebody else’s life and forget to FOCUS on making the BEST of this BEAUTIFUL life that we have been so graciously given.
How we let the PRESSURE of societal or family expectations get to us and we forget to go before or ignore the ONE who has the ORIGINAL blueprints of our lives.
A nursing mama Doctor friend of mine shared with me how EVERYONE keeps asking her how far with work and when she is going back and the pressure is just on from all over and she wanted to know how I coped with that.
I just shared my own experience with her on how I came to where I was atm, a place of PEACE!!!
Recently, my Pastor, Kingsley Okonkwo, preached a message on HIS PERFECT WILL and it just made me further RESOLVED to find HIS PERFECT WILL for my life and follow it FULLY irrespective of all the stuff that’s ongoing in my neighbor’s life. I just wanna live free from all the pressure life brings and of the approval of men/society with their EVER CHANGING STANDARDS and attendant EXHAUSTION!!!
I want to be AUTHENTICALLY ME & SURPRISINGLY SATISFIED!!!
Both lines are titles of two chapters in Priscilla Shirer’s amazing bestseller RESOLUTION FOR WOMEN which accompanies the AMAZING blockbuster movie COURAGEOUS from the stables of the Kendrick Brothers. (What a mouthful lol)
I am yet to read the Book but I watched her talk about each of the resolutions with Moira Brown
on 100Huntley abi 700Club after I had my God-encounter and it helped me crystallize some of my thoughts into words, so I would feature some lines from the book and share both Resolution Quotes at the end.
I love how it is called SURPRISINGLY SATISFIED…
When, it don’t matter the kinda pressure anyone tries to heap on you, you calmly defuse it with a smile that both surprises them and shuts them up.
Because frankly, once you meet a woman who is CONTENT in and with herself, it is usually not just refreshing but SURPRISING. You just wanna be friends with her. You wanna KNOW what she KNOWS.
Someone who understands that her path is uniquely hers, different from her best friend’s or colleagues and has no qualms celebrating others on their own journey EVEN IF THEY HAVE seemingly GONE AHEAD OF YOU for now.
Yes Sweetie , you will surely meet those who are ahead of you on the path you know God has called you to and should I tell you what to do besides sipping on a tall glass of beeferade and haterade?
You go ahead and CELEBRATE HER!!!
Yup, I said that. Celebrate her!!! Compliment her!!! Be an AFFIRMER. And sincerely from your heart.
Tell her you are proud of her and you can’t wait to join her on that level too. If it is a possibility, please ask her to show you the ropes.
Btw, why do we even compare foolishly? Do we even KNOW what God told them?
Guys listen, I CELEBRATE YOU should be a REGULAR feature in your spoken and written convos.
You don’t have time for beef ooo. Can we have WHOLE FRIENDSHIPS that we can TRULY enjoy?
Look, aside NOT comparing and beefing, we also need to FIND JOY IN OUR OWN JOURNEY.
Yes fully enjoy the season that you are in – single, married, with no kids, with small kids, jobless, underemployed, overworked,etc ON YOUR WAY TO THE NEXT SEASON!!!
It don’t mean you are complacent or laid back but you understand the AUTHENTICITY and UNIQUENESS of your own journey, as scripted by God and you are taking your own, maybe baby steps, but steps all the same.
Lemme tell yawl, PRESSURE COMES FROM NOT KNOWING WHAT GOD HAS SAID ABOUT YOU!!!
Then with the pressure comes frustrations and unnecessary drama, beef and so on because you wont stop playing the game of fools – COMPARISON!
You know what, I totally celebrate my NOW…
My days of being a FT mommy to this amazing, extremely energetic bubba whose smile makes me deliriously and unimaginably happy.
I enjoy BLOGGING and being a MENTOR to so many young girls who God has graciously entrusted to me.
I enjoy being this Home maker whose timings are sooooo off tz ridiculous but hey…
Oh goodness, I have learned to find joy in this journey because I know what God has called me to do RIGHT HERE AND NOW!!!
I have much more PEACE than before because I am on my own path and in HIS PERFECT WILL!!!
Does it mean that everything is perfect? Does that mean that I am all of a sudden complacent?
Of course not.
Things will NOT ever be perfect because once you settle one, you will promptly have another ish to deal with, but you should have an overaching banner of contentment over your life that defines you as a person. This means that inspite of all the imperfections and hurdles and even occasional ‘off days’, I can go back to this WORD, draw my strength and keep it moving.
Infact, I am sooooo SATISFIED that I can WHOLEHEARTEDLY compliment another sister who is probably on the path of what God has called her to do, different than but not superior to mine.
I was chatting with a friend of mine on WA two weeks back and she said she was UAE-bound for a training.
Such things used to just make me sad thinking
‘…Chai, if I was still working I would have been going to New York and Geneva too ooo…’
But frankly, I just hailed her that she was ballin’ ooo and teased her that I want her job and she teased me back that she wants KingDaveed.
After that convo, I just had a sweet convo with the Holy Spirit who just reminded me how far I had come from being a tensioned comparison-prone woman to this BRAND NEW WOMAN and I just smiled.
Guys, it pays to know what God told you. I dunno how else to say it.
One of my mentees, Dee, did this lovely post on ‘To hustle or nah’ and it just reminded me of how everyone expects that after BSc na MSc straight and so the tension is up!!! But did God tell ya?
I KNEW like I know my name, that MSc was NOT part of my own life’s journey then so I DID NOT CARE A HOOT who was doing MSc whether in Nigeria or Yankee.
Absolutely NO TENSION!!!
For the records, I was the best graduating student of my set and made a First Class ooo so my Lecturers, a lot of whom I am friends with, used to harangue me to go get a Masters. I was eligible for a scholarship in my school and then some Profs were willing to help me secure scholarships abroad too because my grades were over the roof.
A Prof actually told me that I was wasting my first class…
He missed it.
I KNOW why God gave me a First Class and…
Infact, one day, I will tell a story.
Darling, You go sit before the Lord and get a BLUEPRINT for YOUR OWN LIFE, run your race and quit being a SPECTATOR in another man’s race.
But on your way to the finish line, enjoy the season you are in.
Another angle to looking at being AUTHENTICALLY YOU is that sometimes, some seasons come and then there are just some things you cannot do even though it may be embarrassing or unpopular to admit.
A dear dear DEAR friend (haha she knows herself) was one of those who were to contribute money for something for someone. We had agreed on 5k each I think. 5k seemed like a fair amount for everyone and I was the one to collect the money. Then babe comes to me and says she can only afford 3k ooo so maybe someone should complete her own.
Frankly ehn, that day my respect for her peaked!!! And I have since told her this, over a year later.
Is it that it was only 3k in her account? No. maybe if she pushed herself she may have brought out the 5k but her and her hubs had things to do with money and this was impromptu and it was a gift so she was CONFIDENT enough to say THIS IS ALL I HAVE kpom kwem.
How freeing it must be to just BE AUTHENTICALLY YOU and unapologetically so!!!
Authentic enough to say if need be
‘Babes I am sorry, I CANNOT afford your asoebi but I would be happy to come for your wedding’
‘I think 20k each for a bridal/baby show budget. If you don’t mind, I will pay 5k…’
‘Sorry, I have to be home not later than 10pm so I can NOT hang out with yawl all night…’
Catching the drift?
Because sometimes, it is all in a bid to prove who we are NOT to impress those who don’t really care that we begin to do things that are ‘unlike us’.
I just LOVE meeting women/ladies who are FREE to be themselves, authentically, and then are very quick to compliment and affirm another woman. To celebrate and encourage another.
I have a friend like that. One day I asked her how she was always so encouraging and celebratory of other’s successes EVEN when hers is yet to materialise.
She told me she had to learn it ooo because it did not start easy. But she knows that in celebrating them, she is paving the way for her own. She genuinely celebrates when others marry, deliver, do anniversary, etc. She is the one to always holler whenever i put up KingDaveed’s picture and just commend me for doing a great job with him. Chisom never tires of saying it. That my friend is very amazing walahi. Even when she was out of job, her I CELEBRATE YOU party did not stop. I had to learn from her, plush she used to attend COZA.
You too can LEARN it.
No wonder Paul said
I have LEARNT the secret of being content in and every situation… Phil 4:12
I believe that a TRULY SATISFIED-IN-GOD HEART would be quick to both celebrate and call out GREATNESS in others.
We have to find crazy ways to encourage and compliment one another. Not just on the superficial stuff (your hair is nice, I love your dress, which no doubt are also important) but also on WHO the person is (You do a GREAT job with your kids. My goodness, you are a great home maker. Since you became my boss, you have taught me so many life lessons. I am so blessed to be under your ministry. Your blog has changed my life for good. I covet the skills you have to balance your home, church commitments and work, etc).
All this ‘who does she think she is? Na wa ooo, this one that just got married is now feeling important, etc’ CANNOT help anybody ooo, especially YOU.
Forget BEEF and just CELEBRATE another sister. Like Shirer said, there is PURITY attached to a compliment from one sister to another that may be absent when it comes from a man.
And please not those STUPID backhanded compliments ooo that always come with a BUT which I will address in a separate post. WHOLE compliments.
I random drop voice messages for women who have blessed my life. I recall one beautiful lady I met off my blog and then in person.
In the short while I have known her, she has taught me so many things both as a mom and a homemaker and one day I just random sent her a long voice message celebrating and thanking her. She was REALLY surprised that anyone would do that. Infact most people I have done that for have come up SURPRISED!!!
My sisters, how about we make this the NORM!!!
I think it is innate in every one of us to want to be celebrated and we would draw closer to healthy relationships that affirm us and give us the freedom to be us, even though we are not all on the same level.
Frankly, I want someone to buy a car/house and feel so free to ring me and tell me what God has done for her, knowing that I will wholeheartedly celebrate her even though I am yet to buy mine.
I want to be able to freely share with you and we can pray for one another in purity of heart.
Frankly, I am TIRED of beef, comparison, tension, hate, etc…
Let’s RESOLVE to be
I WILL ACCEPT AND CELEBRATE MY UNIQUENESS AND WILL ESTEEM AND ENCOURAGE THE DISTINCTIONS I ADMIRE IN OTHERS.
I DO SOLEMNLY RESOLVE TO EMBRACE MY CURRENT SEASON OF LIFE AND WILL MAXIMISE MY TIME IN IT. I WILL RESIST THE URGE TO HURRY THROUGH OR CIRCUMVENT ANY PORTION OF MY JOURNEY BUT WILL LIVE WITH A SPIRIT OF CONTENTMENT.
Have a BLESSED week guys and IGNORE JUNK FOOD!!!
God loves yawl like crazzzzzy
This October challenge is almost over… HALLELUJAH!!! Two more Posts to go.
Oh and I think I have a bonus post or two.
No promises. But in 3days, we have THE SPIRIT OF SHUT UP pt 2
Find Part 1 here http://eziaha.com/2015/10/07/the-spirit-of-shut-up-pt-1/