Why am I still single Part 2… A message preached by Pastor Kingsley Okonkwo

Ok guys, sorry this is coming about 2weeks later than I mentioned. My internet has been craps!!! Please read Part 1 here ICYMI

Ok so we continue from number

4. Are you able?

Do you have capacity as in financial capacity? Of course not to say you must have the whole money in the whole world but even at this level, can we see some fruits that tell us you are going in the right direction? Because some guys KNOW they cannot marry yet and not even in the near future but they keep misleading and wasting the lady’s time. They become HUMAN DELAYS and are just in a relationship for the fun of it. THE PURPOSE OF A RELATIONSHIP IS TO MARRY OOO not just to date forever.

Hello men, women don’t wanna marry a poor brother ooo please and don’t spiritualise it. Will you let your daughter marry a poor prospect-free efulefu? No. they cannot marry in faith because the landlord will not collect rent ‘in faith’. The principal will not collect school fees ‘in faith’. My brother, go and work. Marriage is an expensive venture darlings so are you able? Of course same goes for the women, please bring something to the table too.

At this point PK clarifies that story that he didn’t have anything when he married Pastor M incase any brother wanna use that as an excuse to trap a woman. Yes he was not rich but he had something he was doing with his life. He had faith and it was real because it had started producing results. ANY FAITH WITHOUT RESULTS IS FAKE!!! He was already in ministry and though he didn’t have liquid cash, he had a car already gotten entirely by FAITH (He shared the story again). He also had a place he was living and could afford the basics at least. So please PK had faith then, he still has faith and that faith is still producing. All you need to see is potential. If he says he has faith, what has the faith produced since? Are you on course? Are you making any progress? Ehen then you can now hook up with a spouse who is also on course and then things will move on upwards from there. That is how we know you are ABLE.

He also spoke on materialism. Good girls are actually not hard to impress. A good godly girl will understand even if you don’t have it all then. A woman is like an incubator so when you plant that seed inside of her she will nurture it till it grows. So if you have real faith and are bold and eloquent enough, you can convince her to marry you even if her level seems higher that yours at the time. For example, PK with an OND married Pastor M who had a Masters by then. He had a vision and convinced her of it plus promises sef (I will take you round the world) and she married because she is a godly woman and now, it is happening. (He promised her EXCITING or you can just read all the posts in that series here)

PK and PM

PK and PM

Even when they were going to marry, they didn’t have all the money (Pastor M was still doing her MASTERS then while PK was already in full time ministry) but they had faith, confidence, and were led by God and there were weddings and no, the church money no enter am. So please, no loafers whose faith have produced nothing yet not even transport fare. Siddon ehn, tighten your faith belt well, get on the word because faith works before you jump enter marriage.

And again, being financially able ain’t limited to men alone. A woman too should bring something to the table.

Socially, emotionally, mentally ability is also important. In marriage, you would have to be making adjustments and sacrifices to your life, to tolerate. He that would get married will have trouble in the flesh meaning inconveniences which is why Paul says he wants to save us from it all so stay single hehehe (Ephesians )

A mommy’s boy is NOT ABLE – (All those ‘I cannot marry anybody except my mother agrees’ comedian boys)

A selfish self-centred person is NOT ABLE

Just get the message for more biko hehehe. Now the final one

5.Are you amiable?

Are you Pleasant, good natured, likeable? Are you attractive? There is something about beauty and neatness that attracts. Nope, you don’t have to be Miss World to be attractive. Everybody can be attractive. Please order the message 7ways to be a more attractive person. Call our number which I have provided at the end.

Ever noticed that in a group, some people are more attractive than the others and everyone wants to be around them not because they are the finest ooo but because they are amiable. Are you likeable or always frowning? Are you always neat or dirty? It is possible that your physique, cleanliness, ethics and etiquette is what is keeping you single ooo. Ladies you must have your bath at least twice a day: Morning and night. Men can even get away with bathing just once. And you must bath with soap and sponge not just one of the two. The work of soap is different from the work of sponge so using one is like brushing with either only toothpaste or only toothbrush. They must go together to get the best results. You must brush twice daily too. If you have smelling breath issues, visit a dentist and fix it. (Read my dental hygiene post).

Mouth ordor cannot be cured with prayers and fasting ooo. It would even make it worse. Could be food accumulating in spaces in the teeth and the mixture cannot smell nice when you talk. Just visit a dentist and have them diagnose and deal with it. Feel free to have breath mints and co handy to keep your breath fresh.

And he tells the story that makes me laugh EVERYTIME I am listening to the message lol. Here goes

So back then in his worldly days, he went to this boutique to buy some cloths. Back then boutiques in Festac were small and all so as he was there, this girl entered and that was the end of everyone breathing. Her stench filled up everywhere. You can’t talk or laugh because you are just managing yourself to breath small small. Omo, as the girl comot, see how everyone took deep breaths lol. Dem begin breath again. The boutique owner brought out spray and sprayed everywhere hahahaha. PK said instead of her to go and buy soap and sponge, she was coming to buy cloths. Dem suppose baptize am in Izal and Dettol leave am there to soak lol.

So dear, sponge is to scrub all the sweat that accumulates on the skin, with the help of the soap. You must shave your armpit because those hair there will hold odour even if you bath twice. Pk says some people need to use that iron sponge for pot hahaha.

But really as a woman, if you are dirty, what HOPE do your kids have??? Ugh!!!

Also dress well. Not everything in vogue would fit you. Don’t be pressured. Wear what fits and look good in it. Do your hair neat and fine and let it fit. It don’t have to be Brazilian ooo. Tz not she wey get Brazilian dey marry hahahaha. Plus men don’t even know the difference.

Have good character and be polite as a lifestyle not only when you see an eligible bachelor. Use ‘please’ and ‘excuse me’ regularly. Don’t walk into a place and not greet everyone especially when new in a place. You dunno who the boss may be. He may not look like it ooo. Kai, rude girls are a huge turn off.

Have you been blessed today/tonight?

Lol.

This is how PK and now PM end their preaching. Even other Ministers in church

Evening, morning, afternoon or today, once you hear that, sermon is over in DCC Lagos.

Trust you enjoyed this. Please share with your single friends, male and female especially your Single and ready for marriage ones. You can worship with DCC in Lagos.

Victory Dome Behind PHCN Office, Fatgbems Bus Stop, Amuwo Odofin, Lagos

1st Service – 7.00am 2nd Service – 8.30am 3rd Service – 10.00am

Midweek service Wednesday 6.30pm

DCC Victoria Island, Elegushi Beach Road, Beside Meadow Hall School, After 3rd Roundabout, Lekki, Lagos.

Sunday Service – 11.00am

Rush Hour Fellowship (Midweek service especially for those who work on the Island) Tuesdays – 6pm at Silverbird Cinema, Hall 4.

Instead of going to enter traffic, enjoy Rush hour fellowship and be refreshed.

Love Dating and Marriage (the program where this message and such relationship messages are preached) holds at different intervals in the year. If you would call our numbers, they can send you reminder texts if you wish. Website: http://davidschristiancentre.org/ Phone number: 08077714411

See you this weekend with WEEKEND BANTS. Since we are publishing Friday, weekend bants will appear on Sunday.

Blessed weekend guys…

E’

Why am I still SINGLE? A message preached by Pastor Kingsley Okonkwo

I just love this message. I am not sure but I think this was the last LoveDating&Marriage seminar I attended at DCC Lagos. I love it so much that it is the last Singles message left on my phone. It just seemed soooooo practical and useful. So this is dedicated to all my Single FABers. So much to learn from it. Preached by my Pastor Kingsley Okonkwo wpid-pastor-k.jpg So why am I still single? He answers this with 5 questions… Enjoy.

  1. Am I available?

Some people are actually NOT available but they think they are. Some actions or way of life make you NOT available in the ‘Singles market’ which is actually over saturated. There are some mindsets you may have which unknown to you may be sending out vibes to men that you are not available eg Do you always walk around with this thought ‘there are no good men/women anymore’ whilst praying for one? Honey, daz not ghanna wok. As a (wo)man thinketh in his heart, SO IS HE!!! Also if you are carrying emotional baggage, you may think you are available but you are not.

photo courtest intl workplace

photo courtest intl workplace

The energy flowing from you ain’t in line with what you praying for. It is like a house which has a ‘Welcome to our home’ doormat but yet a big dog right at the entrance. You know you ain’t welcome. Emotional baggages would keep getting in the way of conversations with even remotely interested opposite sex and aint nobody got time to continually hear about your ex John who dumped you or whatever horrid happened in the past. Please let God heal any hurt from your past. Also are you dating someone you KNOW you cannot marry whilst yet claiming ‘Single’? Eg dating a married man or some ‘bad guy’.

photo courtesy blogherdotcom

photo courtesy blogherdotcom

You may be thinking you are just holding that person in the mentime till the ‘Mr Right’ comes along but hunnay, you are sending signals even you don’t know about and people can pick those signals. You are emotionally involved no matter what you think. Usually when you meet someone, you are NOT as interested as a fully single person is only you don’t know.

Also, if there is this ‘Bro John’ you have been ‘claiming’ although dude has neither said anything nor is he feeling you laidat. That HUGE emotional investment in Bro John has made you less emotionally available to others but you dunno. It will be clear that there is NO VACANCY in your life for other people. Please don’t lose a good guy waiting on Bro John whom you have seen in a vision lol. Keep it moving and ‘empty’ Love. Bro John aint interested. PK tells the story of this girl in this uni who was overheard praying and claiming a certain ‘Bro John’ who everyone knows was already engaged to ‘Sister Mary’. The girl just dey pray dey claim the man calling out his name and surname sef. You see such a lady, though she is single, she ain’t available. Another way to check if you are available is to find out if you have unrealistic standards. The person some ladies/guys wanna marry is A PEOPLE- 4/5 in one person. I wrote a post on that here. Nobody is 100% and hey even if there was someone like that, guess what? That person wont be able to stand you cos you are not 100%. I want a man that is very romantic, rich, successful, Prayer warrior, Bible teacher, good singer like Don or Kirk, humble like Adeboye, have faith like Oyedepo, excellent like Adefarasin, Prayer warrior like Olukoya, funny like PK, HABA SISTER, ONLY YOU!!!??? Humans are work in progress. That spouse doesn’t have to come 100% perfect 2. Are you accessible?

Photo from Flickr

Photo from Flickr

Some people are available and eligible but they are NOT accessible. They cannot be reached. Nobody got access to her.

Photo from flickr

Photo from flickr

Almost like all those sheltered children whose father had this shotgun or a big dog for any man that dared to visit.

You are certainly not welcome on this property... Photo from Flickr

You are certainly not welcome on this property… Photo from Flickr

As a single person, you must be able to be reached. You can’t be praying for a spouse and continually sit in your room under your bed, tz only mosquito that will see you. And God. But God doesn’t wanna marry. Ain’t no eligible person gonna come under your bed and see you. Which is why it is good for instance to belong to a church and a service group. Too much stories of couples who met whilst serving in church.

photo courtesy mix949

photo courtesy mix949

Being a member of the church ain’t enough especially if you are in all those big churches. Chances that you would be seen are low when all you do is come in, worship and after service you just leave. Ah!!! Bae, how is that gonna work? Join a department/small unit/connect group/house fellowship and let people SEE you and interact with you.

photo courtesy crossedroadsabc.com

photo courtesy crossedroadsabc.com

Not that you just rush into your car after every service without interacting with anybody. Don’t always walk sooooo fast. If you are single, reduce your pace hehehe. But frankly, I met one of my readers who said some people complained that she always walks too fast and with a straight face everytime in church and so was unapproachable. So please, catwalk ehn. Especially as a lady because these guys just dey try arrange themselves, gather stamina and muster courage to talk to you but before they reach you, you don disappear. And as a guy too, you gast be wise/. He tells the story of how in Bible school, first day he spotted this girl he thought he would like to get to know. Unfortunately, they didn’t sit so close. The next day he came early and sat close to the area the girl sat, made it a habit and kept finding reasons to communicate with her even if it meant copying notes he already had and asking questions he already had the answers to. ‘Excuse me, did you copy the assignment?’ ‘Did you get what that teacher said here?’ Of course, they started talking from there. My dear, you must be accessible as a single. Position yourself well. Have hobbies and be involved in them. Be sociable. Have friends. Obviously, he is not talking clubbing and stuff. There is healthy clean fun. Take yourself out if you have to, somebody might meet you there ooo. Nobody must take you there ooo. And while you are there, please be looking around small small. Like my Rev would say, watch and pray 3. Be approachable

From a recent shooting with Nemorosa. Thanks for the great shooting!

From a recent shooting with Nemorosa. Thanks for the great shooting!

Some people are available, they are accessible but to approach them is a different, impossible ball game. If you need to practice how to smile in front of a mirror, please do. Some ladies have a natural frowning face. A lot of men are not bold and they fear rejection so imagine they now gather courage to walk up to you and say hi or anything else to initiate conversation and you just size them up and down and are generally not very polite or welcoming.

photo courtesy flickr

photo courtesy flickr

The guy will just change mouth, turn you to traffic warden and ask you for direction or to borrow bible or something else. Anything but what he was on his mind because your countenance is bad. Please greet people and respond warmly. He that hath friend must show himself friendly. Recall Rebekah and how approachable and friendly she was to Abby’s servant and how she landed herself a rich young eligible blessed man. Another thing is when ladies always walk together like a gang and their countenance makes it hard for any guy to get that opportunity to speak to one privately. Don’t look down on people who don’t have it all now and be like ‘he is not my type’ lol. Some of these hunks we see now have not always been hunks ooo. For example see Rev and PK’s Surulere pix hehehe

hahahahahaha lol

hahahahahaha lol. I wish I can see the third man now

See them today

See them today

so some of these guys you boning now may be multi-millionaires in a few years. No use today scatter your tomorrow. Be approachable. That’s all for Part 1. Part 2 will be up same time next week. That’s Tuesday. Until then, share with your friends aii… Especially your Single and ready for marriage ones Trust you enjoyed this. Please share with your single friends, male and female and you can worship with DCC here WORSHIP WITH US DCC Lagos Victory Dome Behind PHCN Office, Fatgbems Bus Stop, Amuwo Odofin, Lagos 1st Service – 7.00am 2nd Service – 8.30am 3rd Service – 10.00am Midweek service Wednesday 6.30pm DCC Victoria Island Elegushi Beach Road, Beside Meadow Hall School, After 3rd Roundabout, Lekki, Lagos. Sunday Service – 11.00am Rush Hour Fellowship (Midweek service especially for those who work on the Island) Tuesdays:                    6pm at Silverbird Cinema, Hall 4. Instead of going to enter traffic, enjoy Rush hour fellowship and be refreshed. Love Dating and Marriage (the program where this message and such relationship messages are preched) holds at different intervals in the year. If you would call our numbers, they can send you reminder texts if you wish. Website: http://davidschristiancentre.org/ Phone number: 08077714411   And then of course we have our annual WHEN WOMEN WORSHIP coming up next week. Please click on link to get all the details. Friday June 19- Sunday June 21.

WHEN WOMEN WORSHIP 2015

WHEN WOMEN WORSHIP 2015

Ladies, you know you can’t afford to miss this one. Hosted of course by Pastor Mildred Kingsley-Okonkwo

Gorgeously preggo

Gorgeously preggo

Stay blessed y’all

E’

PS

In the, an amazing relationship blogger and sister has this beautiful post up on tips to surviving wedding season. Check it out here http://www.inthemidstofher.com/2015/05/5-tips-to-surviving-wedding-season.html

Feel free to snoop around her amazing blog too

Pastor Kingsley Okonkwo